Chances are, you probably know at least one person who changes their behavior depending on who they are with. Or maybe you are that person. This is actually quite a widespread phenomenon; the thing that makes us social chameleons. But what about a relationship chameleon? What does it even mean? A relationship chameleon is a person who is willing to forget their own individuality by altering their true personality and identity. This can be expressed in different ways and can be either easy or difficult to notice. So how can you tell if you are dating such a person? Here is everything you should know.
6 Signs Your Loved One Is a Relationship Chameleon
1. They Are Extremely Agreeable
First of all, it’s important to mention that there is nothing wrong with being agreeable. After all, agreeable people are well-liked by those around them.
But as the saying goes, “too much of a good thing is a bad thing”, and the same applies to being agreeable.
If you notice that your partner agrees with you on every single thing, be it your political views, your opinion of certain people, and your personal beliefs, chances are that you are dating a chameleon.
In some cases, they may even change their opinion to make it seem like there is nothing you disagree on.
2. They Are Suddenly Interested in All the Things That You Are
Let’s say that you are very passionate about football and/or basketball. Your partner, on the other hand, was never interested in any kind of sport, let alone those two.
However, if you wake up one day just to discover that your partner has become the biggest fan of your favorite sports teams all of a sudden, this can be a good sign that they are indeed a relationship chameleon.
3. Their Music Taste Completely Matches Yours All of a Sudden
Although it’s not too difficult to find someone whose music taste is very similar to yours, you likely won’t find a person who will enjoy listening to every single artist or song you do.
So if you notice that your partner’s music taste changes out of the blue and suddenly they like the same artists as you, they are likely pretending to please you.
4. They No Longer Hang Out With Their Friends
Pay attention to how your partner feels about their friends these days. Did they start ignoring their friends or gradually forgot about them after they got into a relationship with you?
If so, you may be wondering what may have caused this behavior, especially when you never discouraged your partner from seeing their friends.
They probably did this because they wanted to spend more time with you and your friend group.
Or maybe they started thinking friends are not as important to them as you so they decided to give you all their time and attention.
5. They Are All Over the Place
Did you catch your partner changing their tone of voice, manner of talking, and body language when they are around other important people in your life?
For example, they may present themselves as highly extroverted and outgoing when they meet your life-of-the-party friends, being enthusiastic about things they don’t usually care about.
While on the other hand, they can act very introverted around you. Or maybe they are indeed an introvert. Who knows?
Although, it’s worth mentioning that this sign alone doesn’t necessarily indicate that they are a relationship chameleon as everyone can act like this from time to time.
However, if you notice that this is a consistent behavior they display, it can be a good sign they are a relationship chameleon. They want to impress not only you but your loved ones as well.
6. You Think They Lack Identity
You may observe that your partner changes their mind every time to please others and always goes with the decisions others make for them.
They may also seem hesitant to express their needs and don’t have any goals or interests they are passionate about.
Or their goals and/or interests tend to change frequently, making it clear that they try to hide their true self or simply forgot about their identity.
Why Do Some Individuals Become Relationship Chameleons?
A person can become a relationship chameleon for various reasons, such as:
- Thinking they are not good enough. As a result, they will try not to show their true self, fearing that their partner may leave them if they do.
- Being tired of getting into unsuccessful relationships. After a person gets too exhausted from dating people who always turn out a bad match, they may begin thinking that changing their whole identity is the only thing that can save their next relationship.
These are just some of the reasons why people may become relationship chameleons. After all, every person has a unique story of their own that can determine the reason behind their decision or behavior.
What to Do If You Are Dating a Relationship Chameleon?
Talk to your loved one about your worries and concerns, and share your honest thoughts with them. Let them know that they don’t have to change themselves to please you because you love them just the way they are.
It’s also possible that they are completely oblivious that their behavior makes you feel uncomfortable and worried. After all, why would you expect or want them to hide their true self from you?
Reassure your partner that they can be themselves around you and that you don’t want them to change themselves for anyone.
Final Thoughts
Being a relationship chameleon does not make someone a bad person. These people want to be loved just like anyone else, thinking that letting go of their identity is the only way to achieve that.
Fortunately, you can help your partner eliminate this false belief by assuring them that they can be authentic and honest around you. This will give them the courage to open up, gradually learning how to be their true self around you and others.
