Have you begun suspecting that you have an overprotective partner? Do you find yourself feeling anxious and tense when you are around them? Do you crave the independence and autonomy you once had? There are many signs that can indicate your partner is excessively overprotective of you; a red flag you may fail to notice during the first few months of your relationship. So what are the things to look for to determine if your partner is way too protective and controlling of you? Here are 9 toxic characteristics of an overprotective partner you should be aware of.
9 Toxic Characteristics of an Overprotective Partner You Need to Know
1. They Shift the Blame on You
It’s in a controlling person’s nature to point fingers at you and never take responsibility for their misdeeds.
Even when you firmly believe that you’re right and attempt to call them out on their toxic behavior, they still manage to make you feel like everything’s your fault, demanding an apology from you.
2. They Criticize You All the Time
There is a big difference between constructive criticism and mean criticism meant to belittle you.
Your partner has no excuse to keep making fun of your hobbies and interests, fashion sense, music taste, and the general way you present yourself to the world.
This behavior clearly shows they have self-esteem and confidence issues but instead of doing something about their problems, they try to bring you down instead.
Gradually, their constant criticism may shatter your self-esteem, making you question your self-worth and forcing you to act in ways you’d not usually act just to avoid being criticized.
3. They Rob You of Your Privacy
Does your partner demand that you hand over all your social media passwords? Do they constantly ask you who those people liking your Instagram pictures or commenting on your Facebook posts are?
Maybe they even had the audacity to read your diary or take a look at your chats when you were not around.
What’s even worse? They may be looking at your Google search history as well, just in case you have been searching for something “suspicious”.
4. They Don’t Take No for an Answer and Refuse to Respect Your Decisions
Even if you refuse to do something they tell you to do, they still try to manipulate you into doing it.
In a worse case scenario, they may start fighting with you just to show you how wrong you are.
At times, they can completely disregard your personal plans as well. For example, you may tell your partner that you plan to spend the rest of your evening hanging out with just friends.
However, instead of respecting your decision, they completely disregard it by showing up at the spot you and your friends are at.
5. They Eavesdrop on Your Conversations
Does your partner suddenly appear in front of you every time you get a phone call? Maybe they even attempt to check the name of the caller when you exit the room and leave the phone unattended.
This is one of the most common signs of overprotective behavior, which can become more intense and toxic with time.
For example, soon enough, eavesdropping and snooping may not be enough for them and they can even start asking you what you talked about and with whom.
6. They Try to Alienate You from Your Loved Ones
An overprotective partner may start complaining about the amount of time you spend with your family and friends. They may even go as far as trying to convince you they don’t love you enough or are a bad influence on you.
They can also attempt to create misunderstandings and problems between you and your loved ones just to make you feel like they are the only person you can rely on.
In case you refuse to listen to their complaints and demands, they may tell you that you don’t care about them or start ignoring you altogether until you apologize.
7. They Make You Question Your Sanity
This is known as gaslighting and occurs when a person uses psychological methods to make others question their sanity or rationality.
For example, your partner may call you overly dramatic for expressing your legitimate frustration because of something wrong they did. They may also insult you with the harshest words possible and then say “I was only kidding around. Stop taking things too seriously”.
They may also tell you that you’re seeing things that aren’t even there and making a fuss out of nothing. Eventually, they may even attempt to convince you to seek professional help because you have lost touch with reality.
8. They Love Controlling You
Does your partner get frustrated when you don’t reply to their texts or pick up their calls immediately?
Are they jealous of your opposite-sex friends and ask you not to hang out with them? Or worse, demand that you end your friendship with them?
Do they get in your way every time you try to make a decision, even if it’s a minor one, and instead, expect you to go with the decisions they make for you?
If your partner keeps acting this way while completely disregarding your wishes, opinions, and beliefs, they are definitely an overprotective control freak.
9. They Keep Checking on You Excessively
Let’s say you are on a trip with friends and plan to enjoy your time there. But your partner doesn’t allow you to do so because he keeps calling you every 5 minutes, asking you what are you doing at the moment.
This is not a typical behavior you can consider normal in a relationship, which can only get worse with time.
Final Thoughts
Being in a relationship with an overprotective partner can be extremely overwhelming and anxiety-inducing, making you feel like you have to walk on eggshells all the time.
But you should not forget that you deserve better than that. If your partner keeps making your life difficult and you no longer see any hope for your relationship, you should end things as soon as possible until things escalate even more.
