Most people feel jealous in a relationship every now and then, so there is nothing unnatural or wrong about it. However, if it continues for weeks or months, it will end up negatively affecting your relationship in the long run. Therefore, it’s important to find ways to overcome jealousy in a relationship. There are different causes behind someone’s jealous feelings or behaviors, such as past experiences, fear of loss, or insecurity. Therefore, it’s crucial to first identify the cause to overcome it more easily. So what can you do to fight jealousy in a relationship? Here are some tips that may help.
Ways to Overcome Jealousy in a Relationship
1. Be Honest With Yourself
First and foremost, admit that you are jealous. Maybe you don’t want to acknowledge your jealousy because it can hurt your ego or make you look weak.
In any case, it’s important to accept your feelings instead of ignoring them. Although you don’t always have control over your emotions, you have the power to decide what to do about them.
So the next time you find yourself jealous, be honest with yourself rather than dismissing the way you are feeling.
2. Find the Root Cause
The next step is to look for reasons that make you feel this way. Maybe you are feeling jealous because your loved one seems too close to their best friend, or perhaps you have legitimate reasons not to trust a few people they hang out with.
Sometimes, the cause can be your own insecurities that make you feel they are too good for you and so someone can steal them from you anytime.
So make sure to find the reason behind your jealousy before moving to the next step.
3. Express Your Thoughts and Feelings
After identifying what’s causing your jealousy, try to talk to your significant other about it. Calmly express your thoughts and feelings to prevent the situation from escalating.
Who knows? They may even find your jealousy adorable and reassure you with their sweet words. Or they may find it strange and ask you some follow-up questions to find out why you’d feel that way.
Whatever the outcome, you should listen to each other instead of avoiding talking about it altogether.
4. Find a Compromise
If you are anxious because your partner spends too much time with a certain person, ask them if they can make a compromise for you.
This can include reducing the number of hours your loved one spends with that person or meeting them less frequently.
Whatever you decide, make sure it is consensual and agreed upon by both of you so you won’t end up hurting each other’s feelings in the process.
5. Avoid Overthinking
All of us are prone to overthinking from time to time, but doing so on a regular basis can cause various problems, including relationship ones.
Most of the time, overthinking makes you see the problems that are not even there in the first place.
For example, maybe your partner isn’t answering the phone because they are busy at work or sleeping.
But what does your overthinking tell you at that moment? That they are probably doing something wrong they are not supposed to be doing.
And then, you are suddenly hit by a wave of negative emotions like frustration, anger, and jealousy.
The best thing you can do is to control your thoughts. Try not to jump to conclusions and wait for your partner to call back or explain their side of the story.
6. Become More Trusting
Life can be full of all kinds of experiences and meeting new people is one of them. Therefore, it’s crucial to stop yourself from worrying when your loved one is hanging out around new people.
Try to be more trusting even when you have no idea what they are doing at any given moment. Remind yourself that your partner will never do something that can hurt you or sabotage your relationship.
7. Keep a Diary
Whenever you feel overwhelmed by emotions, write down your thoughts and feelings in a diary.
This can help you make sense of your mental and emotional state.
Once you do this, you will no longer feel the need to make a scene, avoiding more tension between you and your loved one.
Keeping a diary regularly can even help you boost your self-awareness and creativity skills, helping you grow as a person.
8. Look at the Situation From Someone Else’s Point of View
Consider talking to your family members or close friends and sharing your thoughts. Ask if they would also feel jealous in the same situation.
Carefully listen to what they have to say and ask for advice if needed. Doing this can help you get a new perspective on the situation and discover things you missed before.
9. Deal With Your Insecurity
Everyone can feel insecure from time to time, but constantly doubting and undervaluing yourself will only make things worse.
Remind yourself that everyone is just as imperfect as you. Therefore, you have no reason to feel insecure as you are no less than anybody else.
Remember, your partner wouldn’t have fallen in love with you if they didn’t find you special.
10. Don’t Play Mind Games
Sometimes, anger makes you throw all your rationality out of the window. And so all you think about is how to take revenge on your partner.
As a result, you may end up doing unreasonable things to make them jealous as well.
However, this behavior will only worsen the situation and tear you apart.
Instead of playing mind games with them, discuss the problem so you can hear each other out.
11. Don’t Act Childish
Unfortunately, jealousy can sometimes make you do childish things, like refusing to speak to your partner or being cold to them because they did something you didn’t like.
And chances are, they may not even know what that something is. Therefore, it’s better to talk to your loved one and let them know why you are feeling the way you do.
Final Thoughts
Relationships and their dynamics can be quite complex, so there will always be difficult times that will test your love. However, you can use such moments as an opportunity to strengthen your love instead of letting it wither away.
