Figuring out your feelings and emotions isn’t always easy. There can be a lot of factors at play that can make you confused about what you truly feel. This is especially true in a dating scene where the confusion can reach a whole new level. That’s probably why you’ve been asking yourself the question, is it infatuation or love? Fortunately for you, there are some clues that can help you find the answer. So without further ado, here’s what you need to know.
Is It Infatuation or Love? Clues to Look Out for
1. Looking at Them Through Rose-tinted Glasses vs. Seeing Them as a Flawed Individual
It’s quite common to be charmed by your partner at the beginning stage of a relationship. The same applies to a potential love interest you are getting to know.
However, when you are infatuated with someone, it becomes so much more than that. You start idealizing the person because they are already perfect in your eyes. You are mesmerized by everything they do, even if it’s something trivial.
You also can’t seem to detect any flaws or imperfections in their personality, which is only expected when you are enchanted by them.
Infatuation can also be accompanied by lust, euphoria, and a loss of appetite. So if you feel lovesick and/or have no appetite, now you know what to blame.
On the other hand, being in love comes with its unique, yet completely different characteristics and experiences. Rather than thinking of your partner as perfect, you see them as an individual with flaws and weaknesses.
Additionally, couples in love form a healthy attachment instead of becoming codependent on one another. They also share a strong bond and know how to openly communicate.
2. Wanting to Be With Them at all Times vs. Knowing How to Enjoy Spending Time on Your Own
When you are infatuated with someone, you become obsessed with them. They are constantly in your thoughts, (basically, what you’d call living rent-free in your head). And you keep wondering what they could be possibly doing at any given second.
Eventually, this can make you extremely attached to them. When that happens, just thinking about them is no longer enough. As a result, you start craving their company so much so that you want to be by their side at all times, which can be the beginning phase of codependency.
On the contrary, being in love with someone doesn’t lead to obsession. As much as you enjoy spending time with them, you don’t feel the urge to be by their side constantly. Instead, you know how to appreciate being on your own while being apart from them.
3. Relying Solely On Chemistry vs.Cultivating Friendship With Them
You can feel the chemistry whether you love the person or just feel infatuated with them. But the difference is that people usually become friends first before they fall in love. In other words, friendship or platonic love precedes romantic love.
So if you haven’t formed a friendship with the person yet, chances are high that you are not in love yet. It’s also possible that the chemistry you felt made you believe you were already friends with them.
4. You Don’t Know Whether They’ll Be a Part of Your Future vs. You Already Envision the Future With Them
You are likely infatuated with this person if you have trouble seeing them in your future plans. You likely haven’t spent a lot of time together yet and are still in the phase of getting to know each other. This means that you simply don’t have enough time to think about any future plans involving one another because you are too focused on the present.
Alternatively, after spending a significant amount of time with a person, you get a solid grasp of their personality. You also start feeling comfortable and secure around them. This is usually the stage where people start to fall in love or are already in love. Once this happens, not only do you become certain that the person belongs in your future, but you also can’t imagine one without them.
Infatuation As The First Stage Of Love
For some, infatuation is something they go through before falling in love. But there are also others who fall in love without going through the infatuation stage.
But as exciting as infatuation may feel, it always ends sooner or later. Some people don’t like this and feel disappointed once it’s gone because of the addiction they developed toward infatuation.
If you are one of those people or fear the same, know that you have nothing to worry or be disappointed about. The reason is simple; once the infatuation period is over, your relationship starts to strengthen, becoming more stable and fulfilling in the process.
Can You Bring the Infatuation Stage Back After It’s Over?
The good news is that you can still be infatuated with your partner after the infatuation stage is over. It just won’t feel the same as before.
Because this time, you won’t be relying solely on the rush of chemicals you were flooded with without even trying. Rather, you’ll be doing things that can add a little bit of excitement to your relationship so you can prevent it from becoming boring.
For example, you can try doing things you’ve never tried before or giving each other gifts from time to time rather than waiting for a special occasion to do so.
You can also experiment with sexual chemistry and try finding ways to boost it. Simply ask your partner if they have some suggestions and share yours as well.
Fulfilling your partner’s emotional needs is just as important as the sexual ones, so it’s crucial to take care of both of them.
Final Thoughts
Although being infatuated and being in love can feel the same, there are some major differences between the two. Knowing what to look for can help you decide whether it’s love or infatuation you are feeling, so pay attention to all these signs to find the answer you’ve been looking for.
